Okay so you did the brave thing. You said yes to the open mic, the karaoke song, or singing at your friend’s wedding. 

 

The decision is made and now here you are – and your heart is pounding out of your chest. First off – and this is a mantra I know I repeat often – YOU’RE NOT ALONE. 

And secondly, why the heck is this happening? 

Your body and nervous system is gearing up to be vulnerable in front of other people and even though you know your stuff inside and out, you feel like you want to jump out of your skin, or run away, or both! 

I’m going to share some of my best tips below, but before I do, I want to say that I’ve worked with singers at all different ages and stages of life and singing journey. 

And what I can tell you is that 99% of them – from the super seasoned singers all the way down to the newbies – feel some level of nerves before they take the stage. 

So when I say “you’re not alone” I really mean it! 

But Jill, my voice shakes so much when I’m nervous. 

I get it! A shaky voice is one of the ways nerves shows up in your body. It means your body thinks something important is happening, because it is! And your nervous system knows it.

As someone who has felt this exact “phenomenon” – and I’ve been doing this for over 20 years – I can confidently tell you that it never fully goes away (sorry). But what changes is the relationship to nerves and how they manifest. 

You stop treating them as a stop sign and start treating them as part of the ride.

I’ve talked about reframing your mindset around nerves, seeing them as a green light instead of a red one here. If you haven’t read that one yet, go give it a read. 

When it comes to nerves though, the mindset shift is huge, but it’s just one piece of the puzzle. 

You can be fully on board with “this is excitement, not danger” and your shoulders will still creep up around your ears, your jaw will be clenched, your breath will be shallow and your voice will still shake like crazy. That’s just where nerves like to live – in your BODY. 

The tricky part is that singing needs the opposite of all that. So even after you’ve done the mental reframe, your body might still be bracing like it’s expecting trouble. And this is your cue to step in and help it.

I want to give you a few physical moves to go alongside the green light mentality. Because sometimes you need to meet your body where it’s at, along with your mind.

A few moves to try before you sing:

1) Roll your shoulders back and let them drop. 

Do it a couple times, big and exaggerated, then let them settle. You’ll be surprised by how much tension you’ve been carrying up there without noticing.

2) Unclench your jaw. 

Let it hang open and loose and do a gentle jaw massage with your fingertips along the hinge. A tight jaw makes for a tight, pinched sound so spend some time here encouraging it to relax. 

3) Stretch whatever needs stretching. 

Stretching your muscles releases tension and nervous energy. It’s like a reminder to your nervous system to “rest and digest” instead of “fight or flight.” 

4) Do your favourite warm-up. 

Giving your body something familiar to do provides it with a feeling of safety and comfort. 

Pair any of these with the green light breath from my previous post, and you’ve got a full-body approach – mind AND body both getting the message that it’s safe to sing.

One last little thing: the audience isn’t hearing what you think —

Most nervous singers assume everyone’s out there marking every wobble. They’re not! Your nerves are SO much louder in your own head than they are to anyone listening.

A shaky note, a breath that gets caught – most people don’t even register it. Some of the most memorable performances are the ones where you can feel someone’s nerves alongside their storytelling and their emotions. 

It’s real and we are human. 

So the next time you feel that pre-singing tightness creeping in, picture a green light, AND give your body a little help too. Mind and body working together! 

Want more tools like this? My course Sing Out Loud walks you through mindset shifts like these along with real vocal technique — 5 days, one video lesson a day, one full song by the end of the week. Check it out here.